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Green People Are SO Annoying!

Green People Are So Annoying!!

Green, crunchy, natural…  Whatever you call them, they are sooooooo annoying sometimes!

You know what I mean, right?

They can be so obnoxious with their…

– whole foods diets and kids that have never touched white flour or white sugar.

– thrift store outfit that cost about $0.50 and looks way cooler than anything in my closet.

– amber teething necklace wearing & elimination communication trained infants.  Yep.  I just called out the babies.

– homemade ketchup, soaked grains, and water kefir.  What the heck is water kefir anyway!?!?

– homemade laundry detergent.  I’m sorry, but I simply do NOT believe you when you say it only takes 1/4 tsp to get your mama cloth clean.  Not buying it folks.  I’m also not buying mama cloth.  No way.

– TV free house and 100% wooden toys that don’t take a single battery.

– grass fed, hormone free beef and organic produce.  If you serve someone a meal, but don’t announce that the food is organic, is it still organic?

– beat juice dyed cake frosting.

– home water birth complete with midwife, doula, and half naked husband.

– confessions of eating Chick-fil-a.  *rolling eyes*  I’ll match your Chick-fil-a meal and raise you an oreo binge.

– cloth diapers, cloth napkins, cloth grocery bags, and especially the dreaded family cloth.

OB-NOX-IOUS!!!!

But…  *sigh*  I want to be them.

Or at least a little bit more like them.

Green People are so Annoying!

I have a girlfriend who is so beautifully crunchy (and truly not a bit annoying).  She uses soap nuts in her laundry.  She cans tomatoes like a mad woman in the summer.  Her babies are cloth diapered.  Her husband gets excited about things like compost bins and rain barrels.

I want to be her when I grow up.

At times I feel like I’m not green enough.

I read other blogs or chat with my girlfriend and think, “That sounds amazing!  I want to do that!”

Or perhaps it would be more accurate to say that I want to want to do that.  Do you know what I mean?

In theory there are some crunchy concepts that sound cool, but the reality is that I’m not making that a priority in my life.  Maybe it is because I don’t have the extra money to spend, the time to invest, access to resources, or interest of my husband.

Or maybe I’m just lazy.

Maybe I love my oreos and reality TV too much to be that green.

And that is sooooo annoying.

36 Comments

  1. Oh. My. Goodness! LOVE this post, Rebekah! I had to leave a local facebook group about green eating when I was attacked for mentioning how I use a microwave. I figure that each green step I take helps. I do what I can. Oh – so I have 3 kids in some type of diaper product and only one in cloth… and he’s not in cloth 100%. 🙂

  2. I think we may be long lost sisters! I laughed at this post… Honestly it made my day! I want to be that green person, I really do. I am taking (baby) steps to get there, but I often feel the same way you do. Thanks for sharing this!

  3. I really enjoyed reading this post! It made me laugh…

    I definitely agree that some ‘green’ people can be a bit snobbish/judgemental with their ways.

    At the same time, I do several of these things (cloth diaper, use cloth napkins, prefer shopping second hand and even use mama cloth {will you still be my friend?!?}). For our family, these choices are both out of the desire to be conscious of our consumption as well as to save money {tight budget/growing family, we honestly don’t see how people afford disposables!}

    I do not think any of these ‘green’ things I do make me any better than anybody else and most of the things I don’t even talk about ‘in real life’.(I’ll blog about mama cloth but only talk about it with a few select friends!)

    And, take baby steps towards living ‘greener’. The easiest place to start is cloth napkins…some scrap fabric and a little bit of time and you have cloth napkins!

    1. Geez, Rachel. I’m not so sure about our friendship after all. 😉

      I actually use cloth napkins and love them, but that is a very great place for people to start. Someone suggested making napkins out of a thrift store table cloth. Isn’t that great?? Love it!

  4. I tried the organic vinegar and baking soda shampoo for one long weekend once and just ended up with limp, oily hair. Tried the organic laundry same weekend and clothes looked like came out of a dingy old clothes bag. Not a pretty picture.

    1. I haven’t worked up the courage to try the baking soda and vinegar shampoo method. It scares me.

      One thing I have heard is that it takes your hair awhile to detox from conventional shampoo. If you can put up with the detox time it is suppose to be wonderful.

  5. I have no clue what a mama cloth is as I do not have any children yet, but my silbings and I grew up on cloth diapers but honestly it was because we didn’t have a lot of money (who would, with 9 kids?) Being the oldest girl, I remember babysitting other families kids, and they had disposable diapers and I used to think “wow, they are rich” HAHA!! If/when I have kids, they will be cloth diapered except in situations where I am out and about and cloth diapers wouldn’t be easy to change and toss…

    I also remember we did use bleach on them growing up, but I wouldn’t do that now. I don’t use toxic chemicals in my home, and I try to cook from scratch. But I am busy, working full time and taking control of a side business, and doing all my household stuff, helping to take care of my mom (who has dementia — probably from all the 9 kids)… And I have other responsibilities that bombard me.

    It takes time to be “green”. I use disposable plates and cups and napkins when I feed my parents (my siblings take turns and so I have them 2-3 times per week. It isn’t feasible for me to have to do extra dishes and laundry when I barely have time to take care of myself. But, we do have cloth napkins, and we hang our laundry to dry (all except sheets and towels). We use homemade laundry soap, and homemade shampoo and homemade body soap, and homemade toothpaste.

    Soon I will do more, but little at a time, for me. I am too busy with life.

    1. You DO sound busy! I think you are doing a great job taking green steps. You can only do so much.

      By the way, you don’t have to be a mama to use mama cloth. 😉 I’ll let you google it. haha!

  6. Hahaah, great post!

    We don’t recycle and I know that we should. But it’s SSOOO much work to do by myself and curbside is too expensive. I’ll add that and composting to my “I feel like we should do these to be totally green but I just don’t wan to” list for 2013.

    1. It is a shame that curbside recycling is too expensive in your area. So many green things cost more (organic food & bath products). Recycling shouldn’t be one of them. 🙁

  7. Great post Rebekah! I agree wholeheartedly with the annoy-ness of green people. Don’t flaunt the leaps and bounds you make and judge me for only taking baby steps (which feel like leaps and bounds to me!).

    In my family we call green people “granola” and we joke–“if I make my own granola, does that make me granola?”

    I enjoy making a few granola changes a year–last year was gluten free, making my own laundry detergent and using vinegar for LOTS of stuff.

    This year shampoo and conditioner are on the list and who knows what else. I”ll probably make a batch or two of granola, too! 🙂

    1. Haha! I’ve heard the term “granola” before. 🙂

      It sounds like you are doing a LOT of green things!!!

      I’m curious. Why did you go gluten free? Does someone in your house have an intolerance for it?

  8. Ha!! Great post Rebekah!!
    I too want to be these people. I still have my cloth diaper stash, which I will soon sadly be selling. If I had the time (hence, did not have to work from home) I’m sure I would be doing more of these things… Yes, we make our own laundry detergent now and YES it works amazingly!! We love our chickens and the eggs they provide but only if we doubled our income could we afford to eat all organic, grass fed, massaged, pedicured and spoiled beef and chicken.
    Family cloth and mama cloth… um… no thanks… 😉

    1. “organic, grass fed, massaged, pedicured and spoiled beef and chicken.” HAHAHA!! I love it.

      Wait a second… Did I know that you make your own laundry detergent??? I don’t think so! I need details!

  9. I do or have done at least 90% of what you mentioned and I still thought this post was hilarious! I don’t do what I do to annoy others or show how wonderful I am (NOT), but because it is something me and my husband are both interested in. And just because I cloth diaper doesn’t mean I do it 100%! Thank you for your insight and humor. I always tell my friends that ask “how do you do so much?”, I don’t really. All of us have our gifts and interests. And because I chose to do the things I do, I don’t have time for scrapbooking or working out or shopping or whatever else there is out there to do.

  10. Rebekah, what a GREAT post! Living in Vermont I cannot tell you how amplified this is in EVERY way, and the guilt I feel by not being “one of them.” At work I get “looks” if I bring Subway for lunch because I didn’t make my lunch from scratch and bring it in a glass container. I also want to want to be these people…but it seems like waaaayyyy to much work most days. The most I can hope for is perhaps a chicken coop somewhere down the road….

  11. LOL! Honey you have to start slow. Think of something you can do green, like recycle. It’s easy and usually the city you live in furnishes the bins. Then just take it from there. Your next step could be, if you live close to a store instead of taking your vehicle you could walk to the store with your kids. It’s good for all of you to get some sunshine and it would be an opportunity to spend a bit of time together. Another step could be instead of watching TV and using that electricity you could have story time. Remember baby steps. Nobody expects you to be full blown green all at once. I guarantee the green people you are referring to didn’t do it overnight. =D

  12. My level of green-ness varies from year to year. I cloth diapered most of my babies but gave up after I got a front loading washing machine that wouldn’t get them clean because it uses so little water. That and having a 4.5 year old kid still in diapers was a little too gross for me at that time.

    Not only are their baby steps but your level of being green will likely depend on your mood, the weather, your mood, how much money you have (being green can cost more!), your mood, how many are in your family, your mood, what stage of life you are in, etc. Can you tell that some days I am just not in the mood to think green. And I went to school in Boulder, CO – a pretty crunchy place.

    1. AMEN! I hate to admit how many times I’ve cleaned out my fridge and *gasp* thrown away *gasp* something that could be recycled because I wasn’t in the MOOD to clean it out.

  13. I found your blog through The finer things in life FB page. I appreciated the statement “In theory there are some crunchy concepts that sound cool, but the reality is that I’m not making that a priority in my life.” We are very green and sometimes the persecusion from those who decided they weren’t as “good” as us is so painful. I don’t do all of those but probably 90%. I don’t do them because I am so cool, more rich or have more time, I do them because they are a priority to me and my family. I don’t give a hoot what everyone else does I just wish I didn’t have to be judged so harshly (and made fun of) for choosing differently. Great post!

  14. I think I do about 3-4 things on your list. And I only keep doing them becuase they work for me and save me money. I agree that it is a lot of work to “go green” in every aspect of life. I do prefer to cook from scratch, but there are some things that we will not be giving up, mostly because my husband loves them so.

    I’ve recently decided that I will do what I can but not feel bad that I can’t do other things. Taking care of my family and myself is more important than spending time thinking about what I’m not doing.

  15. Love your honesty here! I feel like all of us have something to strive for, and yet we will be as green as it is good for our family. When we start obsessing over not being green enough, that’s where we feel unfulfilled and unhappy.

  16. Oh Rebekah… don’t compare yourself to “geener, crunchier” gals. The only person you should be envying is yourself in the mirror. You’re an amazing person with amazing ideas.

  17. I love this!!!! I was reading thinking-story of my life. I look at those people with envy and at the same time thinking will you please get over yourself!!! Lol but I do rock the cloth diapers!!

  18. Yeah! a chance to rant! lol.
    When i started my blog (which i let fizzle out) one of the series of posts i wanted to do was a series of rants against all of the “natural” parenting techniques that i had tried and that had failed for me. I felt so “betrayed”. I was so anti-consumerist (unless it was eco/organic) in the beginning and then i came to the realisation that if many of the things that i “condemned” had been invented (and marketed) it was maybe for a REASON… like a VALID one.

    I tried co-sleeping: terrible for me…i prefered walking to the other room and being awake for 30 mins than spending my whole night tossing and turning.

    Nursing EXCLUSIVELY: I still had my cycles back at 5 months postpartum and got pregnant immediately…so much for natural birth spacing.

    Child-led weaning: I forced myself to nurse through my pregnacies which was painful and VERY tiring…and found that a toddler who was nearly weaned went back to nursing like a newborn once the baby was there. Also My kids (at least 2 for sure) would TOTALLY have nursed until the age of 5/6 or longer… I finally cut them off at the age of 3

    No bottles: My fourth was a Preemie. I pumped while she was in the hospital but made the very painful/stressful decision to go with the bottle as my milk had mostly dried up. The main reason for all the pain/stress was the mom guilt. For the record i had an even CLOSER bond with her than my breastfed babies, she has no teeth problems and was relatively healthy (just prone to bronchitis the first year from premature lungs…but i have a friend whose son was not premature and nursed 2 yrs and had the same type of problems…explain that one!)

    Cloth diapers: To get them REALLY clean and smelling good, you have to, at least occassionally use some chemical products. Also they say it helps kids potty train sooner…. in my case: no. Mine all trained around the age of 3. I quit cloth when i arrived at 3 in diapers at the same time….hanging out all those diapers takes time! Add to it the wet sheets, the wet outfits….and my wet shirts from leaks…the amount of clothes you need on and multiplies, the loads of laundry mulitply…green detergents are more pricey and poopy diapers need the HOT cycle costing more in energy. I was so relieved to start using disposables!

    Baby food: I mostly just let them eat from my plate…and actually i would recomend that. But if you are really serious about weaning you need to always have something on hand that is appropriate for them and when traveling…so baby food was a good ally with the third.

    Baby Gear: at first i thought i needed nothing…but with the quick arrivals of more babies I really regretted not having a swing, a bouncy seat, a playpen and some light up toys to keep them occupied.

    Baby wearing: Result my back was KILLING me, I was SO HOT (not much airconditioning in the south of France, and everytime i went to untie and lay the baby down…she woke up! (no rest for the mama)

    Home Birth: I did my second birth at home feeling disappointed in the relation with my DR and hospital for the first…it was nothing miraculous however…i chose to have my 3rd in the hospital again for the benefits of peace and calm and room service! lol

    I could probably keep going…but i’ll stop here for now…i’m just a little disgruntled! lol i’ve gotten over it more the more time has gone on…and though some weeks i miss my organic only store…my current budget just won’t allow for it so i try to roll with the punches and not worry too much! (btw, every time i get geared up to make my own granola …about twice a year… i am reminded each time that none of my kids like so it’s up to me to finish all of it…and they are still eating processed cereal) 😛

    1. *clarification on hospital vs. home birth: In France, the hospital birth requires a 5-6 day stay…hence, the benefit of time to focus on the baby (without siblings hovering all day) and having meals delivered.

  19. Thank you for saying what many of us are thinking. Women are always comparing themselves to one another and worrying whether we’re being green enough as a mother is just one more way… ugh

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